BWAHAHAHA!
Jun. 12th, 2006 02:19 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gin_tonic*has loud laughing fit and makes people look at her like O.o*
all of the following were generated by Drabble-Matic
Hannah and Des
by William Shakespeare
Enter Hannah
Des appears above at a window
Hannah:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the butter, and Des is the doggie.
Arise, stormy doggie, and lick the fruity cake.
See, how he leans his eye upon his belly!
O, that I were a glove upon that belly,
That I might touch that eye!
Des:
O Hannah, Hannah! wherefore art thou Hannah?
What's in a name? That which we call a mouth
By any other name would smell as incredible
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like a cake that had just gotten its icing"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove breathless.
Hannah:
Swain, by yonder fruity cake I swear
That tips on a broom the sexy sun--
Des:
O, swear not by the cake, the half-baked cake,
That hungrily changes in its cool orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise cool.
Sweet, pretty night! A thousand times pretty night!
Parting is such nice sorrow,
That I shall say pretty night till it be morrow.
Exit above
Hannah:
Sleep dwell upon thine eye, peace in thy belly!
Would I were sleep and peace, so lovingly to rest!
wisely will I to my stormy mouth's cell,
Its help to lick, and my incredible mouth to tell.
A Pretty Occurrence
Hannah paced up and down, jiggling her eye. Her very good friend, Mary Sue Sun, had arranged to meet her here on a broom. "I have something half-baked to tell you," she had said.
Mary Sue Sun was late, which was very unlike her. Any moment now, Hannah expected to see her bounce up, her breathless hair streaming behind her and her incredible eyes aglow.
Hannah heard footsteps, but they seemed rather stormy for a delicate and fruity girl like Mary Sue Sun, whose tread was sexy. She turned around and found Des staring at her.
"What are you doing here?" Des said quickly. "I thought you said you didn't want to see me again."
Hannah had said that, but now she was beginning to wish she hadn't acted so wisely. "Mary Sue Sun asked to meet me here." As she gazed at Des, her mouth began to throb hungrily.
"Oh," Des said, lovingly. "I'll just go then."
"Wait," Hannah said and caught Des by his belly. "I was wrong. I still love you. Can you ever forgive me?"
"Yes," Des said, smiling. They wrapped their arms around each other and kissed, like a cake that had just gotten its icing.
From behind a cake, Mary Sue Sun watched with a nice light in her cool eyes. She took a list out of her pocket, and checked off "Hannah/Des". Then, she skipped off to help an embittered man find love again, just as soon as she'd saved the doggie from extinction.
To Angrily Suck
Harry and Draco were celebrating a handsome Valentine's Day together. Harry had cooked an invisible dinner and they ate in a broom shed by candlelight.
"My darling," Draco said, stroking Harry's dick, "I have something for you." He gave a box to Harry. "It is but a rash token of my horny love."
Harry opened the box. Inside were arrogant clothes! He gazed at it lovingly. Then he gazed at Draco lovingly. "It's brave," Harry said. "Come here and let me suck you."
Just then, an irresponsible crone sprang out of hiding and cackled like a freshly pickled toad. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in a cool voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.
Draco read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my brother."
They stared at each other snottily as the crone cackled some more. Harry's tongue began to tremble. Then Draco shrugged, pulled out a hair, and hit the crone on her arm. She fell over dead.
"Problem solved!" Harry said and kissed Draco passionately. "This is a sexy Valentine's Day!"
They hungrily burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.
And then they sucked each other all night long.
The Cool Terror Of The Snow
It snowed a foot overnight. When they woke up, Draco and Harry went out to play. First, they made snow angels. Then they had a snowball fight and Draco hit Harry in his hand with a big sexy iceball. It hurt a lot, but Draco kissed it carefully and then it was all better.
Then they decided to make a snow man.
"We'll make a really hot snow man!" Draco said.
"Why don't we make a snow woman instead?" Harry said. "That would be more pretty and politically correct."
"I know," Draco said. "We can make a snow mermaid. That way, we don't have to worry about gender politics."
So they rolled the snow up huskily and made a nice snow mermaid. Draco put on a cake for the lip. The mermaid was almost as big as Harry.
"It looks soft," Draco said lovingly. "But it seems like it's missing something."
"Here," Harry said and held up a long massage. "I found this on the Quidditch Pitch." He put the massage onto the mermaid's head.
It was perfect. For about a minute. Then the mermaid, even though it was just made of snow, started to move and growl like the setting sun that's kissing the earth that still slightly damp from the afternoon rain.
Harry screamed preciously and ran but the snow mermaid chased him until he tripped over a tree root. Then the snow mermaid kissed him tenderly.
"Nobody does that to my little Horny Love," Draco screamed. He grabbed an icicle and stabbed the snow mermaid through the dick. It fell down and Draco kicked it apart until it was just a bunch of snow again.
"You saved me!" Harry said and they shared an embrace in the snow before going in for hot chocolate.
The massage lay in the yard until a sunny child picked it up and took it home.
That last one is even more "...err..." than the others. And it's way to much fun! :D Must.Stop.Now.
all of the following were generated by Drabble-Matic
Hannah and Des
by William Shakespeare
Enter Hannah
Des appears above at a window
Hannah:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the butter, and Des is the doggie.
Arise, stormy doggie, and lick the fruity cake.
See, how he leans his eye upon his belly!
O, that I were a glove upon that belly,
That I might touch that eye!
Des:
O Hannah, Hannah! wherefore art thou Hannah?
What's in a name? That which we call a mouth
By any other name would smell as incredible
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like a cake that had just gotten its icing"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove breathless.
Hannah:
Swain, by yonder fruity cake I swear
That tips on a broom the sexy sun--
Des:
O, swear not by the cake, the half-baked cake,
That hungrily changes in its cool orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise cool.
Sweet, pretty night! A thousand times pretty night!
Parting is such nice sorrow,
That I shall say pretty night till it be morrow.
Exit above
Hannah:
Sleep dwell upon thine eye, peace in thy belly!
Would I were sleep and peace, so lovingly to rest!
wisely will I to my stormy mouth's cell,
Its help to lick, and my incredible mouth to tell.
A Pretty Occurrence
Hannah paced up and down, jiggling her eye. Her very good friend, Mary Sue Sun, had arranged to meet her here on a broom. "I have something half-baked to tell you," she had said.
Mary Sue Sun was late, which was very unlike her. Any moment now, Hannah expected to see her bounce up, her breathless hair streaming behind her and her incredible eyes aglow.
Hannah heard footsteps, but they seemed rather stormy for a delicate and fruity girl like Mary Sue Sun, whose tread was sexy. She turned around and found Des staring at her.
"What are you doing here?" Des said quickly. "I thought you said you didn't want to see me again."
Hannah had said that, but now she was beginning to wish she hadn't acted so wisely. "Mary Sue Sun asked to meet me here." As she gazed at Des, her mouth began to throb hungrily.
"Oh," Des said, lovingly. "I'll just go then."
"Wait," Hannah said and caught Des by his belly. "I was wrong. I still love you. Can you ever forgive me?"
"Yes," Des said, smiling. They wrapped their arms around each other and kissed, like a cake that had just gotten its icing.
From behind a cake, Mary Sue Sun watched with a nice light in her cool eyes. She took a list out of her pocket, and checked off "Hannah/Des". Then, she skipped off to help an embittered man find love again, just as soon as she'd saved the doggie from extinction.
To Angrily Suck
Harry and Draco were celebrating a handsome Valentine's Day together. Harry had cooked an invisible dinner and they ate in a broom shed by candlelight.
"My darling," Draco said, stroking Harry's dick, "I have something for you." He gave a box to Harry. "It is but a rash token of my horny love."
Harry opened the box. Inside were arrogant clothes! He gazed at it lovingly. Then he gazed at Draco lovingly. "It's brave," Harry said. "Come here and let me suck you."
Just then, an irresponsible crone sprang out of hiding and cackled like a freshly pickled toad. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in a cool voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.
Draco read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my brother."
They stared at each other snottily as the crone cackled some more. Harry's tongue began to tremble. Then Draco shrugged, pulled out a hair, and hit the crone on her arm. She fell over dead.
"Problem solved!" Harry said and kissed Draco passionately. "This is a sexy Valentine's Day!"
They hungrily burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.
And then they sucked each other all night long.
The Cool Terror Of The Snow
It snowed a foot overnight. When they woke up, Draco and Harry went out to play. First, they made snow angels. Then they had a snowball fight and Draco hit Harry in his hand with a big sexy iceball. It hurt a lot, but Draco kissed it carefully and then it was all better.
Then they decided to make a snow man.
"We'll make a really hot snow man!" Draco said.
"Why don't we make a snow woman instead?" Harry said. "That would be more pretty and politically correct."
"I know," Draco said. "We can make a snow mermaid. That way, we don't have to worry about gender politics."
So they rolled the snow up huskily and made a nice snow mermaid. Draco put on a cake for the lip. The mermaid was almost as big as Harry.
"It looks soft," Draco said lovingly. "But it seems like it's missing something."
"Here," Harry said and held up a long massage. "I found this on the Quidditch Pitch." He put the massage onto the mermaid's head.
It was perfect. For about a minute. Then the mermaid, even though it was just made of snow, started to move and growl like the setting sun that's kissing the earth that still slightly damp from the afternoon rain.
Harry screamed preciously and ran but the snow mermaid chased him until he tripped over a tree root. Then the snow mermaid kissed him tenderly.
"Nobody does that to my little Horny Love," Draco screamed. He grabbed an icicle and stabbed the snow mermaid through the dick. It fell down and Draco kicked it apart until it was just a bunch of snow again.
"You saved me!" Harry said and they shared an embrace in the snow before going in for hot chocolate.
The massage lay in the yard until a sunny child picked it up and took it home.
That last one is even more "...err..." than the others. And it's way to much fun! :D Must.Stop.Now.
